Sexual Dreams and You!

This isn't apropos of anything. I just found myself on a dream interpretation website and thought I'd bring it to 11points. I like dream interpretation -- nothing is what it seems, everything means something else. No matter what Freud said, a cigar is never a cigar. 

For today, I'm analyzing 11 different sex dream subjects to let you know what they REALLY mean.

1. Dream of a dominatrix, find God.

   If you dream about...a dominatrix it means that... you're looking to find God. Apparently, dreaming that you're a dominatrix means you're looking to step up your spirituality. Not sure how digging your spiked high heel into someone until they say the safety word (most likely "razzmatazz") is a sign that you're looking to be born again, but hey, who am I to argue with abook?
   
2. If you dream about... watching someone get naked it means that... you're compassionate. Watching someone get undressed shows you want to understand that person better so you can empathize and become more comfortable with them. I suppose this even applies if you're watching them get undressed through binoculars outside their window.
   
3. If you dream about... castration it means that... you feel uncreative. Makes sense, getting your genitals lopped off is akin to not being able to express yourself by painting seascapes or making a bunch of pots.
   
4. If you dream about... orgies it means that... you need to have fewer hobbies. Take a note: If, in your dream, you're getting spread too thin by simultaneous sex with a half dozen people... maybe it means you're getting spread too thin in real life. So give up stamp collecting or you're going to keep dreaming of getting gangbanged.
   
5. If you dream about... an erection it means that... you should finally start writing that novel you're always talkin' about. Erections don't mean erections in dreams. They mean you have power and energy you need to use, and, most commonly, use in a creative way.
   
6. If you dream about... wearing a chastity belt it means that... you're too protective. Clearly. If you want to put your lady genitalia under lock-and-key, it's a sign that you need to relax.
   
7. If you dream about... condoms it means that... well, it depends on the condom. If the condom is wrapped, it means you need to start letting other people voice their opinions. If you're a woman and you dream about a man wearing a condom, it means you feel emotional protected. And finally, if the condom is unwrapped, it means you're sexually frustrated (naturally, because every dream interpretation has to be the opposite of logical).
   
8. If you dream about... incest it means that... you forgive a family member for an argument. Seriously. Your subconscious mind rewards them sexually. And yes, that's gross, but it doesn't mean (1) you're sexually attracted to your sister or (2) that you should take the dream as a sign and act on it in real life. She gives you a nice birthday present, just thank her with a heartfelt hug.
   
9. If you dream about... performing oral sex on yourself it means that...you're a selfish bastard. But hey, I respect you for dreaming of something so ambitious.

Dream Moods

Symbols are the language of dreams. A symbol can invoke a feeling or an idea and often has a much more profound and deeper meaning that any one word can convey. At the same time, these symbols can leave you confused and wondering what that dream was all about.

Acquiring the ability to interpret your dreams is a powerful tool.  In analyzing your dreams, you can learn about your deep secrets and hidden feelings. Remember that no one is a better expert at interpreting your dreams than yourself. 

Every detail, even the most minute element in your dream is important and must be considered when analyzing your dreams. Each symbol represents a feeling, a mood, a memory or something from your unconscious. Look closely at the characters, animals, objects, places, emotions, and even color and numbers that are depicted in your dreams. Even the most trivial symbol can be significant. 

Interesting Dream

I was in a building in a busy downtown city and all of a sudden alarms were going off and it was being evacuated. Some type of chemical/poison was released somehow. So as I exited the building, I am standing along side a busy one way street; traffic coming from right to left as I was facing across the street. 

Looking over, I see a woman with a red sweater sitting on a bench looking at me inquisitively and I at her. I start crossing the street and continue to ponder why she is examining me so closely and the significance. I get to close enough to her (but not out of the street), and realize and say to her, "I'm dreaming, aren't I?!" After this realization, I turn and face the oncoming traffic and see my car coming towards me (driver unknown)...in real life and in the dream, I had a sticker on the hood that said, "Satori". I yelled "Satori", banged my hands on the car and realize it drove right through me. Then I was standing in more oncoming traffic, but I couldn't hold onto the lucid state and was wisked away into unconsciousness again.

First Time flying Lucid!

I was in an apartment of some kind being chased by an FBI agent with a gun who turned out to be Condoleeza Rice (lol dont ask me why). Anyway, she chased me down the stairs of this apartment until I reached I dead end which turned out to be a small room with a toilet and a window which I couldn't get out of. Suddenly it came to me that I was dreaming and became lucid so I became invisible and drifted through the wall to see Condoleeza slowly approaching the room which I was in with her gun ready thinking I was still there, but I was right infront of her.

The hell with this, I thought, so I jumped throught the wall and starting flying (I've had flying dreams before where I was aware, but not completely in control and 100% lucid, so i knew what I was doing) and played around with my flying speed trying to go faster then ever before! So fast that it scared me a little =)

So I was pretty excited and getting all arrogant, I wanted to see what position my sleeping body was in. I felt my body and its position in the bed and shortly after that I woke up... happy to have my 1st completely lucid dream!

Dream Sex 102

So what do we really want with dream sex?
We really want connection, relationship, and a shared experience, even in our dreams! For many beginner lucid dreamers who are used to “abracadabra I can get whatever I want” this often means a difficult shift in perspective from grasping for gratification to connecting to our inner passions.

I don’t mean to suggest that you can’t be gratified. The opposite is true; remember that piece about how orgasms can be real? By focusing on relationships first and sensations second, many lucid opportunities will come your way. And once you make the shift, you will probably find that your waking life sexual relationships will become more fulfilling too.

Sacred Sexuality and Lucidity

The erotic energies are very strong. Lucid dreaming is an altered state of consciousness, and the sexual energies in dream, trance, and visions have been explored for millennia by mystics, magis, and saints as a path to know the Divine. In fact, some of the earliest known paintings in the world, including the famous cave art of Lascaux, France, depict sexual ecstasy (note the erection of the bird-man).

In Christianity, the medieval mystics, such as Teresa of Avile and St. Catherine of Siena, explored sexual themes in their ecstatic trances. Taoism, Sufism, and Buddhism all have developed mental practices for sacred sexuality as well. Many of these ancient practices focus on cultivating sexual energy and then using it to purify the mind and the body.

Delving into lucid dreaming sexuality may have some unforeseen results due to the power of the erotic energies

All of this is to say that sexual energy is well known by consciousness explorers as having more value than scratching the pleasure centers of the brain. While getting closer to the Divine may not be your intention, it is helpful to know in advance that delving into lucid dreaming sexuality may have some unforeseen results due to the power of the erotic energies.

By the way, a classic book that is explores sexuality, spirituality and lucid dreams is Patricia Garfield’s Pathway to Ecstasy: The Way of the Dream Mandala. Highly recommended.

The Carrot on the Stick

The Carrot on the String

Now that I’ve covered the basics of lucid dream sex, I’ll move on to the real trouble with using lucid dreaming to explore sexuality: the Carrot on the String.

How many times have you realized you are dreaming and then wasted no time finding a romantic partner to couple with, only to find that the would-be-lover walks away, transforms into someone who is not attractive, or becomes angry and menacing?

Maybe you disengage to find another partner, only for the process to repeat again, either by meeting resistance, disinterest, or bizarre character transformations that you couldn’t even tell your best friends about out of sheer embarrassment.

Just when what you want is in reach, something yanks the string and you are left grasping at air.

This is the “carrot on the string,” one of the greatest self-limiting constructs in lucid dreamwork. Just when what you want is in reach, something yanks the string and you are left grasping at air.

The reason this happens is because most of the time we do not really crave lucid dream sex, but sexual connection. Nor do we really want to “have” that attractive person. Long story short, once we stop treating our fantasy dream loves like objects (specifically: carrots) to have or possess, entire new worlds of possibility open up.

Sexual Lucid Dreaming!

This is a topic that never goes out of style. Exploring sexuality safely within the confines of the dream world is one of the prime motivations for learning how to lucid dream. The promise of “exciting dream sex” is a marketing hotspot, so to speak, for beginning lucid dreaming guides, books, and dozens of dubious meditation CDs.

What these guides don’t tell you, of course, is how difficult it is to perfect the art of exploring erotic energy in dreams, and what the pitfalls are along the way.

Let’s start with a little question and answer about the basics and then move on to the possibilities of exploring sex and sensuality in dreams.

Q: Is it true that you can learn how to lucid dream and have sex with your ultimate fantasy?
A:Yes, it’s true. In fact, the experience can feel like the real thing. All sensations in a lucid dream, after all, feel as real as the waking world, provided you have felt the sensations before (or similar sensations) and have working memories to draw from.

Q: Are dream orgasms real?
A: Yes, it’s been scientifically documented that orgasms in lucid dreams can be real orgasms, accompanied by muscular responses, a quickened heart-rate, and vascular tissue change too. This is true for men and women. However, not every lucid dream orgasm is necessarily a physical one; some seems to just trip the pleasure center in the mind, particularly if the arousal happens quickly or instantaneously. We also don’t know about the electrochemical angle yet, such as endorphin release, oxytocin levels, etc.

Q: What about wet dreams?
A: There is plenty of anecdotal evidence that lucid dreams that end in orgasm for young men can result in real-life ejaculation. I don’t know about any scientific studies that have proven this is a lab… that would be a tough sell for finding volunteers. In any case, ejaculating from a lucid wet dream is totally healthy, and probably an indicator of a good sexual health in general.

REM sleep is simply exciting from a biological standpoint.

Q: Why are my lucid dreams so erotically charged?
A: REM sleep is simply exciting from a biological standpoint. Erections and the female equivalent (engorgement) come and go all the time in normal dreams. Becoming consciously aware in a dream often means becoming aware of our bodies’ physiological arousal as we dream. There is also a connection between flying dreams and this physiological arousal — which may explain why the top two lucid activities are flying and sex!

Q: Is it unethical to have a sexual lucid dream about someone who is not my romantic partner?
A: That is not something I can answer for you. If it’s a concern, discuss it with your partner. It is also important to consider that private fantasies can affect relationships with real people, even those who invite sexual projections, such as celebrities. However, at the end of the night, things happen in lucid dreams that we often don’t intend, and I would never suggest that someone feel guilty about a dream they had because it seemed like a good idea at the time. Even St Augustine, the medieval Christian priest who essentially coined “original sin,” forgave himself for his wilder dreams.

Q: Can you get addicted to lucid dream sex?
A: I have never heard of such a case, because of the self-limiting factors in lucid sex dreams. In other words, lucid dreaming can fulfill fantasies, but unhealthy or dishonest fantasies result in inabilities to “follow through” with the dream scene, as I discuss below.